Trying to conceive without success can create deep conflict and tension between a couple. Here are some common challenges that can affect couples struggling with fertility, with extra tips on how you can heal and move forward together.
1. Different ways of coping
Differences in gender sometimes affect how spouses deal with stress. These differences in coping can cause conflict in the relationship. For instance, where one partner appears cool or impassive, the other may read this as a lack of concern. On the other hand, the other partner may accuse their spouse of overreacting.
2. Differences in opinion on how to move forward
After undergoing several unsuccessful fertility treatments, a couple may disagree on the next step to take in their family planning. This can either be due to the cost of certain fertility treatments or the comfort levels of these treatments. For instance, when a round of IVF treatment does not take, the decision to pursue this course of treatment again can result in conflict. Additionally, opting to consider other family building options like adoption, surrogacy, or to remain childfree can cause further stress to the relationship.
3. Financial stress
Most couples are likely to disagree on the costs of the treatments and on how much they’re willing to invest in these treatments. Fertility treatments such as artificial insemination/intrauterine insemination (IUI) and IVF can be expensive as most are not covered by insurance companies.
Additionally, the time taken off work to attend fertility treatments and appointments, travel, and accommodation (especially if the fertility treatment center is out of state) can cause further financial strain. Many couples pay for these treatments themselves, and the resulting financial strain may lead some couples to rack up debt to finance these treatments. Alternative family building options such as adoption are also quite costly.
For additional information on sperm donation and sperm bank Los Angeles, visit the Pacific Fertility Centre in Los Angeles. Professionals att PFCLA will be able to help you navigate this difficult time while offering you and your partner real solutions to fertility problems. Though fertility treatments can be costly, working with the most trusted professionals will ensure your investment is well handled.
4. Loss of sexual intimacy
Most couples that have been trying fertility treatments for a while often tend to neglect sex. Scheduled sex can often make sex seem like a chore to get through, additionally, it may result in feelings of performance anxiety. While scheduled sex can seem rote, what matters is how you both use this scheduled time.
5. Struggles on when to seek support
Choosing to talk about your struggle with infertility with a close friend or family member is a decision you will have to make together. This can often be a cause for conflict in the case where one partner may want to talk about it and seek support, and the other does not want to share. Most times, this willingness or unwillingness to share is often based on feelings of shame and embarrassment.
How to cope.
In marriage counseling or relationship counseling, the counselor acts as a mediator. Marriage counselors hear out a couple’s problem and allow this couple to conduct dialogue in an organized and productive way. A licensed marriage therapist or couples therapist provides a full spectrum of mental health services for any of the issues affecting a relationship. What this means is that a therapist helps a couple work through their present-day issues (trouble sharing chores for instance), but also considers the psychological history of recurring problems that a couple may be facing. For instance, a counselor may examine one spouse’s feelings of psychological stress e.g. anxiety or depression, and determine how it affects their behavior towards their partner.
While an LGBT couple may not be struggling with infertility, a therapist can help walk you through the family building options that are best suited for you and available to you. Single women or single men seeking to start families of their own and who may not be undergoing a medical diagnosis for infertility can use the services of a counselor to help with seeking out the best-assisted fertility treatments (e.g. IVF, surrogacy), or adoption.
Seeking out the help of a marriage counselor or therapist can increase intimacy and restore the initial attraction you felt to one another.